


Observation

by Adventures_in_Writing



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Background Grimmons, Flirting, M/M, Tuckington - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-15
Updated: 2014-09-15
Packaged: 2018-02-17 12:28:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2309675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adventures_in_Writing/pseuds/Adventures_in_Writing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I mean, yeah, they’re not attacking us, but they’re still fun to watch.”<br/>“They’re just talking.”<br/>“For a kickass ex-frelancer, you’re pretty shit at observation, aren’t you?”<br/>Tucker didn’t need Wash to tell him. He knew first hand how utterly oblivious the man could be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Observation

**Author's Note:**

> A short little Tuckington thing. Originally posted on my Tumblr.

Tucker prided himself on being a certified Love Doctor. It was his sole purpose in life. If he wasn’t hitting on the ladies, he was passing on his wise words of wisdom to friends who needed a little help. He had often told his Blue teammates and Red enemies that he was a lover, not a fighter, and it was something Tucker believed to be true. It was pretty damn hard to prove just how good he was though. There were no goddamn girls in the canyon! There had been a couple of girls around but they were either completely insane or half woman, half shark. Oh, Tucker had tried with them for sure, but it didn’t work out. Not that he was expecting it to.

He would have tried his pickup lines on the guys, but he knew first-hand how they reacted to Donut’s comments. Nope. In this scenario its better to just stick to the ladies, even if Tucker liked both. Everyone did their best to ignore Donut’s comments, so why wouldn’t they ignore Tucker’s? He supposed it might have something to do with the fact that Tucker would always intentionally make innuendos. For some reason, Donut seemed to just have a certain way with words. Reds aside, in his own team he knew Caboose well enough to know that the blue soldier wouldn’t even understand a pickup line. Not that Tucker would try it on the youngest member of the team. He wasn’t Tucker’s type and besides, their friendship was tenuous at best. He really needed to work on that. Church was an asshole and no longer around. Washington, on the other hand…

Tucker’s thoughts were interrupted when a soldier in light blue armour and yellow accents walked over to him.  
“Fuck it, Wash, I already did four laps of the canyon and a hundred pushups and squats.”

“I know,” Washinton replied, “Is everything okay? You’re just sitting out here on your own watching the Reds. They’re not even doing anything.”

“That’s not true,” Tucker said, “I mean, yeah, they’re not attacking us, but they’re still fun to watch.”

“They’re just talking.”

“For a kickass ex-frelancer, you’re pretty shit at observation, aren’t you?” Tucker didn’t need Wash to tell him. He knew first hand how utterly oblivious the man could be.

“How do you mean? I can read a battlefield pretty damn well.” Wash could easily come up with a number of times his observation skills had saved his teammates from more than a couple of bullets.

Tucker shook his head and looked over to the Reds again.  
“I mean people. Like how they interact with each other and stuff.” He grinned. “I’ll give you an easy example. Grif and Simmons. Tell me what you know about them.”

Washington thought for a moment.  
“They get on each others nerves really easily because their personalities clash? Grif is a lazy slob and Simmons likes neatness and order. Grif is constantly pushing his buttons and pissing him off. They work pretty well as a team when they aren’t bickering, but unfortunately that isn’t very often.”

“Not bad,” Tucker admitted, “Though those are the really obvious, basic things. You’re missing a couple of key points.”  
Washington was genuinely curious and looked to where he could see Simmons and Grif arguing.  
“They’re so fucking in love that I don’t know how anyone misses it! Half the time they’re insulting each other, they’re flirting.”

Wash raised an eyebrow. His tone of voice was level despite any internal disbelief. “Flirting.”

Tucker nodded, “Yeah, dude. Flirting. Clearly it’s not a concept you’re familiar with. You know how best friends talk shit to each other? Kinda like that. Grif is fucking awesome at making Simmon’s flustered or annoyed. He gets a total kick out of it. Simmons yells at Grif all the time because he’s not that great with comebacks. You can tell he’s actually angry when he uses his high-pitched screechy yell. You know the one I mean. Sure, they get on each others nerves but you get that when you spend every day with someone. They’re totally banging each other.”

“I don’t believe you,” Washington said. Simmons and Griff? They were still arguing and probably would be for a while. “Definitely don’t believe you.”

“Why not?” Tucker asked, “It’s not like they ever talk about chicks they wanna bang. They hardly about chicks at all, actually. I can probably count the number of times they have on one hand.”

“Unlike you,” Washington grinned, amusement in his voice.

Tucker replied without thinking. “Dude, I really don’t care who I bang.”  
Washington blinked (not that Tucker could see through his visor) The look of surprise on Tucker’s face was priceless and told Washington that the aqua (seafoam?) coloured soldier hadn’t meant to divulge that information.  
“Fuck! Uh…I mean to say…I _did_ get banged by an alien…So…”

Washington laughed and Tucker wasn’t sure if he’d heard that before.  
“It’s fine, Tucker. I won’t tell anyone that you don’t care if you bang girls or guys or aliens.”

“To be honest, I’d rather not get done by an alien again…was fucking sore for a week! And don’t get me started on being pregnant. Jesus fucking Christ.”

Washington shook his head, laughing harder. He didn’t know if Tucker was being serious or not. He stood, turning to look at Tucker. It was interesting to know that Tucker didn’t care either way.  
“I wonder if I could make you that sore…” Wash said thoughtfully.

Tucker didn’t know what to say to that. Wash was into guys? Into girls and guys? Was he just toying with Tucker? His mouth moved of its own accord.  
“Bow chika bow wow.” Washington shook his head and Tucker grinned. His moment of surprise quickly passing. “Would you like to schedule an appointment with Doctor Fuck to find out? I’d love to have you as a patient.”

“That wasn’t an invitation, Private.” Washington’s tone wasn’t its usual ‘I’ve-had-enough-of-your-shit, Tucker’.

“I know,” Tucker said with a shrug before turning his attention to the Reds again, “But mine _was_.”  
He wasn’t expecting anything from Washington. In fact, he was assuming the ex-freelancer would brush his comment off with a dead-pan rebuttal or something. He was good at that. Excellent, even.  
Washington took a few steps towards Blue base before turning back to Tucker.

“Let me check my diary.”

As far as Tucker was concerned, that was virtually a yes.


End file.
